swallowing darkness becomes a habit, not a choice because you are confined by walls that reach up towards the sky, that take away the only light left. you don't choose to be stripped of emotions and void of feeling but it is taken from you. you are left with thoughts that crash over you like tsunami waves and you are left wondering, 'how can you swim when you are drowning?' a highway with no exit, a room with no door. you are forced to trap yourself, forced to take refuge in the darkness that resides inside of you.
this isn't even a dream, this is the reality of loneliness.
these towers are brick barriers I am trying to break but it's hard to break free when people hold it together on the outside. they don't want to see your insides. they enjoy too much the murals, the pretty pictures intricately carved on the outside of the tower. the only reason Rapunzel let the prince in was so she wouldn't feel this emptiness that threatened to swallow her whole. but that meant having to hurt herself as he tugs on her hair to climb on upwards. to appreciate happiness, you must first understand pain. but I am all pain, all dark, all empty and I am starting to think that darkness is inevitable. and escape is impossible.
you can't be invincible when you are invisible.
- dina xx
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