I'm not big on this whole real life thing so let me try to relate this to something because apparently my whole life is a metaphor about trees and wind and the night sky and the galaxies and honestly I doubt its a bad thing. I mean, every snowflake is different but just as beautiful and all that.
but I can't tell if the music I hear that lulls through every background at every event is getting monotonous or if its stagnating and my fear is that one day the conductor will put down his baton and the bows will rest on their strings and the choir stops singing. I am not ready to call it quits. not when I haven't done anything significant enough to bring about the melody of the flutes or the bass of the drums and I can't breathe like this maybe I need to inch myself closer to the stage, maybe the orchestra isn't playing loud enough. I need to block out the noises too please don't be selfish when I get used to it they do too. give me something new please I can't have my lungs choke in the embrace of my own ribs screaming "you're holding on too tight!!!"
shhh. I can't hear the trumpets. shhh I can't hear the alto solo. shh. I'm trying not to get used to this.
- dina x
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